nothing much

thank god work resumes tomorrow, i'm glad i don't have to go over days and nights with nothing much to do. For the coming week, the schedule will be retained and that i am having my work in a 10-6 shift. The retention was brought about by the upcoming audit, since we had shutdown we weren't able to join to some sort of orientation or briefing. Probably the upper men thought we can't handle audit lol and doesn't want to take any risk. haha. anyway it's alright, i don't mind not undergoing is a quite a relief though to have distorted sleep pattern is not a relief at all. hehe.

now i don't know what else to write about. hmmm... a super dim light from a post outside the window adjacent to where i am lying down, noise from the vehicles passing by the highway plus the sound of the fan rotating plus the light from the laptop screen plus the sound from the television and the barking puppy at the living room plus Nina Simone's tame low tone voice in tune of the Beatles' Here Comes The Sun seemed like a lullaby that i'm so ready to sleep. hehe.

well i don't know how to end this post... uhm. i just don't know. hahayz :|

can we just talk?

it is cold today and still my fan is on 3, inches away from me. it is jampacked raining outside and gloomy -- too dark for 4:30pm. i love days like this when you can cuddle yourself and beam on things to the tune of songs easy on the ears. Well it's "How Deep is Your Love" by the bird and the bee, which is part of the upcoming Sex and The City movie.

In the hopes of keeping my afternoon busy, i stumbled into a thread in which i used to post in, "i hope mabasa niya to" thread which made me think of things. Ironic may it be but how can we have so much thoughts to share or thinks to tell someone when we don't have the chance to. When we are all free and the moment draws us to speak all we want, we cannot even utter a word or two. We are able to clearly see things and finish a whole paragraph when it is no longer needed. Why can't we just talk then and there without any hesitations? Why can't we talk upfront? Why can't we not regret? Why can't we not say that i'm all done, hands off without feeling remorse? or maybe a simple mind reading ability could have made everything easy and fast.

Well, that's how the world goes and for what ever left unsaid for now may never be spoken and will remain unsaid for as long as forever. Maybe we are just given one opportunity in a lifetime and when we pass by that, there wouldn't be any downright second chances. Maybe what matters in this world, is having the gutts for the first and last time. Maybe this world is for those stronger souls who are ready to risk anything, who are never afraid to speak out, for those greater soul who never feared or maybe not.

I just hope that one day i'll find myself fighting for what I really want, I hope I can be one greater soul somehow someday.

disappointments and moving

i am darn disappointed, i already processed the "NG" that i got and up until this moment -- wala pa din. my respect for the school has been deteriorating since i stoop down on the halls of the university but i gave second thoughts as for the so called "benefit of doubt" but with everything that had been and has been happening i don't know where to find that respect anymore. kainis! good thing, the secretary of the office of the dean showed some effort to check on the records. well for now-- i'm stucked! i can't process my terminal clearance. damn it!

I had an LSS, i know this is almost unbelievable but anyway LSS stands for Last Song Syndrome incase somebody doesn't know hahaha, on "Bukas Na Lang Kita Mamahalin" for quite sometime now and wala lang like yung "I Don't Wanna Be Your Friend" eh pag nauubusan na ng kantang kakantahin yun at yun nalang ang balik balikang kantahin. Natawa lang ako sa gitna ng aking inis at pagtextext bout my rage on the matter, eh narinig ko yung song na yun. Eh! It doesn't frequent the airwaves nor being sang randomly nowadays, ayun may program sa Audio Visual Room na katabi lang ng faculty room and dinig na dinig pa. Actually some faculty even sang in tune of it at nag comment pa na nagkamali daw ung kumanta -- off key daw! ahaha.

i don't have work and so i had the chance to work on some other matters, i was able to check on my upcoming modular review and settled my accounts and i was also able to process my passport in one day. it was actually my first to get the passport and I did it alone -- okey naman i had it processed in less than 2 hours though it will be released 20 days after pa. I went to the Department of Foreign Affairs to file it and luckily i didn't have nay problems with regards to my application. I was just so disappointed with the fact that there was slight differentiation on the system they are implementing. First,it doesn't follow the first come first serve policy well, stage 1 is an exemption. I submitted my application on stage 1 ahead of the others, but i don't know for whatever reason, i had the following stages later than the others. Second, the staffs or shall i say "some" staffs doesn't allocate their time well. I had noticed that the Payment in-charge had her break around 30 minutes or so without even considering that applications were growing in pile and when she got back her cash register on the first punch signaled that the i-don't-know-what-do-they-call roll of paper had been consumed and needed to be changed and she doesn't know how to do it --- see a waste of time. Third, now this is out of context but still with regards to the DFA office, considering that it was a regional office it should have a budget for the physical expenditures -- the place was all messy! gahd! it doesn't seem like a regional office at all. I have to merit the office though for anticipating the needs of the applicants by having, a knock down photo studio, a canteen nearby the waiting area and a photocopier just inside the building. I also do give credit, to the assistance they are giving to the applicants everyone there knows the process and the even share guidelines including those incharge at the photocopier. yay! atleast i've accomplished something :D

then i headed home na! hahayz nothing significant happened last night, i just wasted my time on tv, net and by around 10:30 or 11pm i was asleep. Anyway i'm back to work by july 1st so that would atleast keep me busy and lessen any deep thinking.

latest song: The Man I Was With You by Jimmy Bondoc

want.responsibility.need

I was to post the other day, unfortunately i didn't know what more to write other than the sun up, the heat is all over and i'm not loving nor hating it -- i just don't like to sweat under that heat. good thing, sky's pouring some rain from time to time. uhm the rapid and unpredictable change in weather could be the after effect of human pretentious ignorance. honestly, i fear for the future i don't know what would eventually happen. i wanted to make a blog for a campaign, unfortunately i am not quite sure if it will be realized anyhow i am on the process of thinking of strategies on spreading the word. well i'm calling the campaign "LIVE GREEN".

uhm another thing that i wanna share is all about food. well, i am fond of eating shawarma and yogurt nowadays. i don't know but it's kinda weird how i came to like yogurt, when i hated it the first time i tasted it. i have to admit i am quite maarte when it comes to food or whatever that enters my dirty mouth. once, i'd say i don't like it shouldn't and wouldn't pass through my lips in anyway or i'll puke. i love yogurt now, the one with strawberry bits. i consumed one pint in one sitting. haha. Shawarma, I've eaten this a couple of times back in college but i rarely ate it na especially when i transfered school. Recently I got a munch of it and walah! I'm craving for one every now and then. Once day, I ate 3 of those and was craving for more... haha gluttony. ew! I love to eat though, I don't spare food and go on a diet. hehe

i don't have work pala 'til july first since we reached the quota before the end of the month and so we had to shutdown for days though we can actually float to another department if we want to and if slots are available. Today, i attended the Home Room Parent-Teacher Meeting for my brother who is in his sixth grade. Actually it was my first to join one and errr i was elected the president. hahaha. never did i expected this, not once in my entire academic travel that i was nominated for president. i just don't know how to go about this bahala na si batman! hahahaha this is just insane -- i'm not even a parent! ayun, i had to shell out and swallow my shyness in... kakaano to speak infront of other parents. hahayz. well the said meeting ended still being me as the president. wtf kanchaw inabot ko sa cousins ko. errr. bahala na! hahaha

i'm just listening to new and not so new tunes in spare time and wala lang. i will be going back to school tomorrow to check on some needed things and to work on my passport. hahayz :)

cold days and songs

it's raining! weee i love the weather but don't get me wrong... i feel bad sa mga nasalanta ng bagyo din naman. i just like the feel of breezy cold. no big news for today but i guess i'm doing fine, well music other than work eat up my time. hehe. wala lang i just find it comfortable to sit around or lay around with some tunes. i'm currently looking for the Desmond Child rendition of Dianne Warren's "I Don't Wanna Be Your Friend", if you're not familiar with title well Nina did a cover on this one wherein she had her wet not-so-good-for-my-sight music video. haha. I'm currently listening to the Dominique Van Hulst version of the song while looking for that male rendition, had that before kaso when the pc was reformatted I wasn't able to keep a copy so wala ang hirap maghanap. hahayz. I checked out for the lyrics and it dawned me na ang lungkot pala ng kanta na toh! Hehe. i'm not affected but it's a sad sad song. sigh.

aw! I remember now,one thing that excites me is the new album from MYMP. yay! this will be released daw hopefully by august. yeee! sana not an all-original album, sana may covers pa din. as much as i hate it being overplayed,yung covers, i still want them to do some. hehe. woohoo! i hat my excited nerves, hate the feeling and impulse. lol.

I wanna stay home and jut lay down the whole day, i can live with the coldness and some songs but then again i have work and i;m much eager to earn really so i'm letting go with the pleasure of the weather. hehe. "goodbye goodbye... don't call me in the middle of the night no more, don't expect me to be there!" ouch! hehe. well another set of lyrics pondered upon, sorry rhythm catches me first kaya nahuhuli yung deeper meaning ng songs, though fortunately magaganda rin naman yung choices of songs ko. :D

tomorrow is another working day and i'll be or shall i say i need to be early! i hope the weather would remain the same for a couple more days para mas masaya ako. hehe. i just love the cold mornings!

dettach and work

i am so so so out of context. i don't know maybe i was too focused at my work that i overlooked some errands to an extent. good thing that friends had updated me about the upcoming review and other stuff. i'm just so pissed right now knowing that i processed my "NG" subject for almost a month already and up until now wala pa rin nangyari -- it's just so disappointing. i'm just not so proud of what kind of institution, i graduated from. errr.

anyhow,i have to fix my schedules for the modular review as so as much as possible it wouldn't clash with work. unfortunately i got some errands to fix with school and requirements before it hits the start and hopefully maayos in time. hehe. with work naman, i'm just so determined to be able to earn, got my first compensation last monday and i'm glad to earn that amount with all sweat. I've saved it to buy something more grand to at least keep something from my first ever job, i'm sporting for the ipod speakers and sana lang magkasya yung pera na maipon. hahayz. well we'll see.

another thing, i'm happy that i am getting along well just fine with my peers, i am able to laugh around and spill some antics too. it is just getting well and shux! work isn't hat easy pala talaga we had our audit the other day and kakaba sobra. it was like having an impromptu oral recitation, kakakabog ng dibdib and it wasn't just me even those who have been in an audit has that feeling of butterflies. it's just nuts waaaah! but then we were fortunate enough that we weren't questioned and stuff, he -- who ever he was, just observed what we were doing and pass by. thank god! but hey it didn't made any difference with what others felt kakatakot talaga. hehe. there's another audit coming and hopefully it will turn out well. yaix!

father's day again!

it's father's day today and i had my off from work, it was unplanned but i had the last minute decision to not go to work. i really had a hard time though since i kinda have thought na sayang what ever i'll be earning supposedly for the day but then i just persuade myself as this was just one fo those "sometimes" get together with my family. hehe.

we celebrate most of the time together with the family from my fathers' since i don't know hindi mahilig ata yung sa mother's side eh ung mga celebrate celebrate na ganun. i don't know we rarely celebrate on the mother's side except on some instances but anyway ayun our uncle treated us sa shakey's!. hehe. we had lunch with pizza and chix --- walang rice! haha. anyhow may slight regret since sandali lang kami natapos so by around 3pm eh andun na kami sa bahay ng lola ko and that's an hour after yung supposedly time-in sa work. hehe.

we hitched sa wheels ng isang uncle ko, pero before we headed home eh nagpagupit pa xa somewhere in dvsoria so me, my lil bro and my cousin eh naghintay 'til he was done with his haircut. To kill the time, we just went to have our window shopping at some stalls of pirated dvds and vcds --- wag maingay!. Since mainit i shoved them to a nearby mcdonalds to cool our mouths with something sweet, i had Oreo Mcflurry by the way it was my treat. hehe

ayun then we headed to our lola's house and like any other sunday nanood ng tv maghapon and eat. hehe. as it was father's day, i remembered i had a blog entry last year and i read it again. Kakaaliw lang yung day when i had our groceries with my lil cousin.. ganun pa din naman yun makulit.i just hope maulit and i realize i love kids except for those spoiled brats! hehe

damn!

uhm i just got from work and like any other day --- good thing i get along well with my group mates. we just talk or sing the time out and walah! it was less than two hours 'til we pack up and head home. hehe. bad thing though, i just hate the fact that i am being nagged about being slow errr! i am with my cousin at work and i hate it when negativity is thrown to me. I know my capabilities and limitations but i don't need pressure -- it just smashes my motivation out. I don't need to be reminded of the fact that i am quite a sloth at things but i try to compensate it naman din eh by not being lazy and using time well as not to waste any.

basically i am trying to adjust and widen my patience. i am not quite sure what is up for me in the coming days 'coz i am yet to meet other co-workers. i belong to one department and it is inevitable that i will be sent to another to float around most especially when there will be uneven distribution of people. i am just furious how people would accept me since i gained weird looks from some this early. hahaha what the heck! anyhow i am just so glad that i get along well with my groupmates and that i can say i am having fun to an extent. hehe i can do what others can, i maybe maarte , conio-typical in some degree but i am flexible. damn it!

???

i am not quite sure what to write now, all i know is i wanna write. hehe -- weird! uhm came from work and i'm enjoying things. Life seemed to be so-so now, nothing grand.. nothing exciting nor intriguing just plain so-so. I am quite detached though from my life before maybe because i am more focus on work. Not much texting as if i am an avid texter haha btaw i barely cuddle my phone, net not so often, i still listen to music and got some new discoveries, uhm what else? nothing significant these days. hahayz. i just hope i am not missing a lot from whatever is happening beyond me.

out in the real world

o oh! i am way behind... it's already june and it's independence day. the last time i blogged in was a month ago and plus plus days. i am not quite sure where to start since 33 days is 792 hours and that sure is a lot of stories to tell -- i used the digital calculator to compute on the total number hours as so you know. anyhow, i have a job now --- the process and the job itself isn't that easy.

welcome to the real world, lining for my first real interview in search for a job. Despite of the fact that i have someone to back me up, the pressure is on me to pass every step of the way. I fell in line for hours under the heat of the sun for the interview. I have to admit i was a bit anxious it was my first and i wasn't quite sure what to expect, there was even no familiar faces. I think i did fine over the interview since she-- the interviewer had a positive facade as i went out the room and you can actually see her enthusiasm.

days after i was to take the examination -- anxious still. pressure rushed in upon knowing that it was a 65 item / 15 minute exam. it was not that hard though time bombed me to death -- geez i am not really good in math and i am not into it either. I was skeptical with how i did, since i know the math part was just a pik-pak-boom play but oh well i made it to the orientation. 2 days of boring discussion on the system that the company is implementing to poisoning -- yep! poisoning. i took another exam and this time was a more serious one that delved on what were tackled during the two days and this time pressure was on me 2 days was a lot to stuck in my little brain and err i have a deteriorating memory. i am also glad that i now have a buddy to at least ease the unfamiliar --- he is from the same school and knew him when we had our duty in malaybalay, same boarding home.

weee good news! i got a high score on that exam and yeba! i was in for my on-the-job-training. we were given a week to comply some requirements and i did. happy! happy! Now the nature of my work --- well it is a blue-collared job but what the heck i am earning. hehe. i am on the packing line which means.. i pack food goods -- that's nestle! pack it, seal it, box it, pile it yup! need some strength there but kayang kaya! haha. I am on my 3rd week now and i am fine, getting to know people and getting used to the job. it's hard to earn --- cliche but that's for real.